When I read Egidio’s challenge this week, we had just left In-N-Out Burger. It had been forever since we had been there. A cheeseburger, fries, and a vanilla shake hit the spot. It used to be the go to place on visits to California so every once in awhile we get that longing, or urge again.

That’s different. This week Egido writes of a more intimate longing, one that becomes a part of us.

Saudade, from the Brazilian and Portuguese culture, might best be described as the presence of absence, longing.

We all know change is an inevitable part of life. Saudade sees the transience of things and accepts that all things will fade, but there is still a love that remains, the recollection of feelings, experiences, places or events that once brought pleasure , and now triggers the senses allowing us to live them again. –unknown

My daughter delivered the eulogy at my dad’s funeral. She works at a church and reached out to her spiritual leadership team to help her collect and organize her thoughts. Like others that day, she had a list of memories from countless summers in New Hampshire. Lobster feeds at beach cottages, boogie boarding, beach combing and boardwalks all bring a smile to my face, as the New England culture is alive and well in family.

She decided not to share those memories.  

Instead, I remember her deep breath, her words powerful and profound when she said, memories are secondary to the way he made me feel. She remembers joy and laughter. She remembers feeling valued and loved, and she remembers togetherness that almost always included ice cream.

Her words got me thinking of the raw emotions that come from longing. And as I watched her, I realized the feelings ingrained in her were as much a part of her life, as his… and mine.

She remembers, the tiniest autumn leaf was never about raking season, and not necessarily a sign of autumn at all. Instead it was a reason for walks and talks in the woods.

I think saudade comes naturally with no rhyme or reason except.. it matters. There will always be times, places, or people, that become a part of who you are or who you become.

And as I watch my grandchildren at what we call, “grand camp”, I think about that. Will the simple moments like the day my grandson set up his chair to watch the day wake up, perpetuate his love for the ocean?

And will nature, and discovery become a priority, like the day they found all the hermit crabs in the world, and a squid who got lost under a rock?

This last photo is now a canvas on my wall. And while they talk about their sand dune stage, waiting for the sunset and going back someday. Maybe all that really matters is…

We were together, I forget the rest. – Walt Whitman

Wind Kisses, Donna

Thank you Egidio for introducing us to saudade and allowing me to place a word to the feelings in my heart. Forever grateful. -D

Next week for the Lens-Artists Challenge, join Tina.